Last night I was in 7-11 and a man let me pass him, like a gentleman would. While I passed him, he said, "Youre gorgeous." I thanked him. But I thought about the way he looked at me. Like I was just drop-dead gorgeous. I feel beautiful for the most part. My weight gain has made some days feel as if I am not beautiful, but for the most part, I do feel beautiful.
But I dont want just any man to tell me Im gorgeous. Sure I appreciate it, but I want that ONE man. Who rolls over in the middle of the night, sees my bare face and lion hair and thinks, "Gosh shes gorgeous!"
Some day right?
I am praying to God I get to keep this job.
I am praying that life, MY happiness, finally falls into place.
I don't want a perfect life, just a happy one.
I want it all to come together.
I want to sit there and think, "It all came together!" But I guess it always does right?
God's plans are exactly where I should be.
He put me here.
He will provide.
He will never leave me without.
I need to learn how to breathe.
To focus on the here-and-now.
I get so much anxiety thinking about the future. As if I can control it. But I cant . I can only control whats in front of me.
My life will FALL INTO PLACE.