12:25 AM

I am DEDICATED to losing weight, but sometimes I get so sad that I have to count points. I get it, no one is perfect, not even celebrities. They took have weight issues and are FORCED to be thin....and to that I think, "God they must be starving!" I mean really, I am STARVED sometimes. However when I wake up, I am feeling thinner. Counting points is an issue I HAVE TO deal with, because I can CHANGE my fat. Instead of complaining about me being fat, I am doing something about it. 
But I thought about fact this came after I began to cry. I was TRULY convinced that I will never find another man who wants me for ME. As in me=weight wise. I was thinking, what about if I go on a date? Id have to count points. I mean with my ex, I told him I was on Weight Watchers , one month into dating. I figured, he needed to know if he was going to be apart of my life. Counting points is EMBARRASSING to me sometimes. Sometimes I starve half the day because I am only allowed so many points and I must save them for the next meal. Or when a friend says, "Lets go get drinks!" the first thing I think of is, "How many points is that margarita gonna be?" and when they suggest dinner, I totally have a spaz attack in my head. I start having mental seizures. So typically, I DO NOT GO OUT. After all, my friends are thinner and if they are not thinner, they are not on Weight Watchers. 

Maybe this is just me...

Have you ever felt like this on a diet?



safire said...

You will find someone who loves you for you! From your pictures, I can tell you are GORGEOUS!

That said, eating on plan IS a pain when you are trying to live your life but it's something that hopefully becomes more natural and not forced with time. It takes work but I'll take being healthier any day than from the "me" that was unhappy at my highest weight gorging on food.

Have a wonderful week!

Unknown said...

I'm really sorry to hear that you struggle so much with your weight, but I have to say, someone will love you for you, Stef, and if he doesn't then he's not the right guy. Any dude, that will judge you because you care about losing weight and you count points is a douchebag, and isn't worth the time of day. You'll find the right guy when you least expect it, don't lose faith.

Now about going out to eat with your girls, go out girl. If you go to a restaurant, look at the menu and choose something you like but looks the healthiest. Eat half of it or a portion of it, and take the rest home for later. Nobody says you have to eat the whole plate in one sitting, and you definitely dont want to starve yourself or hesitate from going out because of your weight. All you need is a little self-control.

Have a drink or two, eat a portion of your meal, and skip out on dessert. Hope this helps in one way or another. :)

Leslie said...

i totally understand and idk about you but i even have a "friend" who gives me the ugliest stares when i would order food or when id add sugar to my tea,i felt so disgusting going out to eat with her cus shed be like "your gaining weight stop eating like a porker" and now shes all about eating healthy! so its hard cus shes crazy size 2 thin! you know so i would always go out w/ my other girl friends an i ONLY order water w/lemon i dont care what people think! n i dont force myself not to eat i do order what i want but way smaller then what i used to like i used to eat 6 fried chicken tenders and now i only eat 3 you know i feel that helps me eben though im still hungry i push the food away an immadetaly ask for a togo box so i wont be tempted to keep eating "out of sight out of mind" and i sip sip my water and if you wait at least 10min you wont be hungry anymore

Stephie J said...

aw babe! I know its hard but its all about planning ahead. Scope the menu before you go out and decide on something you would be able to eat! Dont be embaressed about WW.. be proud! You're making a great change in your life!

stay motivated

Rawr Girl said...

It is hard to try an eat out and count points. I save my 49 for the weekend and try and plan ahead. For instance, this weekend being Memorial Day, I am going to a barbeque Monday. So I will need to skip the usual point splurge on Friday and Saturday. I've already decided to make a 13 point pizza for Friday night, and a 4-point dessert, Saturday and Sunday will be like a normal weekday points wise, and then by Monday I will have 39 bonus points left. I will have a very light breakfast and lunch so I have most of my daily points as well, and plan on bringing a salad and/or healthy meat to grill. This way I can treat myself to whatever goodies they have there. I can't binge of course (something I am just overcoming), but I should be able to have lots of little tastes of anything and everything that looks good.

Hope that helps.