Saturday's with Stef: I'm not that girl anymore....

12:10 AM


This post may not make ANY sense to those who haven't lost weight or struggled with their weight...but I am having, "The old me" complex...

What does this mean? I know I lost weight...I feel it and see it EVERY DAY! I am proud of myself! Oh yes I am! *Toot toot!* But my mind hasn't caught up just yet. Some days, my mind still pictures myself like this:


SICK AND CRAZY RIGHT?

That's NOT me anymore....I guess I am starting to realize this because I am dating and I have all those questions because, let's face it...MEN ARE VISUAL CREATURES! So what questions are  are running through my mind? 

"What if I am too fat for him?"

"What if I am not pretty enough for him?"

"What if I am still that BIG girl who held so many insecurities?"

"What if I am not good enough...?"

Yes these are questions that often play with my mind.

In my head sometimes, I am STILL that big girl. Someone told me its called "Big Girl complex"...But whatever it is, I was feeling a strong case of it last night and the other day. I have to remember, I am NOT that girl anymore...

Yes, this is stinking thinking...

I am not HER anymore...but SHE made me who I am today!





7 comments:

Marta said...

That's the past, just think of the present and how far you have come from that picture to today's picture. Keep moving forward!

Big Mark 243 said...

You know I have my moments where doubt and insecurity builds up on the other side of the wall that holds them back... but the wall never breaks and the 'twins' never come over the wall...

... as long as you are doing what you know works for you, you can always trust in that and KNOW beyond a doubt that you aren't 'that girl' anymore and that is because you are doing the things which 'that girl' didn't want or couldn't do..!

Plus, you rock..!

Heliotrope Tree House said...

I still have that with insecurities. You are right, it is "stinking thinking" and I think we just have to keep on working hard at building ourselves up again. Love you, Sis.

just tututiny said...

You are beautiful the way you are my dear ;) happy holidays!
I am hosting a giveaway, would love if you stop by can check it out ;)

Inez said...

Let it go Stef! You're beautiful inside and out! :D

Dawniepants said...

I know that feeling but youll move on and work your way through it

Dp

WitchHazel said...

I know exactly what you mean and I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who still thinks of myself and sees myself as the "old me"! It's just something we have to push forward through, because we are NOT those girls anymore ;)