SATURDAY'S WITH STEF: My heart hurts

12:00 AM

I had this whole motivational blog post ready to post, but last minute, I had a shaken soul and just needed to vent.

Ive been crying for the last two days. Maybe its because I am PMS'ing . I feel HORRIBLY depressed when mother nature comes around and I start thinking and panicking.

Our house situation isn't getting any better. I mean I am so confused why we are even in THIS situation. I have always thrived on stability. I just LOVE stability and nothing is stable in my life right now. Money is an issue, my living situation is an issue and I feel so overwhelmed. So it gets me thinking, what man is gonna want me. I'm so terrified right now and I am trying so hard to suck it up, hold back my tears and smile. And it's just been the past two days I have felt this way. 

I feel like I have taken care of people emotionally and I have no one. Just a hug. Just someone who can assure me this is all part of a plan. Some amazing plan. Some AWESOME plan. Something magical that I don't know.

I need another job. I need a positive change.  

My soul and heart hurt right now and I'm overwhelmed.

There I vented.



I Teach said...

:( I don't know what kind if job you're looking for but do a Google search for Trotta Associates. They also have a facebook page.

I Teach said...

:( I don't know what kind if job you're looking for but do a Google search for Trotta Associates. They also have a facebook page.

lizzlove said...

Hey Stef, My name is Lizz, We once had a conversation on Instagram were i accidently said something that upset you..and i apologized for it and everything was good. I decided to follow your page on Facebook and for some reason today i decided to look at your blog, I never had before, but i did now. I feel your pain because i once felt the way that you are feeling, yes hormones do suck at times..but when you talk about how you need somone there like a man figure. You may not beleive me but i was there once i felt like i needed that so bad to feel happy.
I found the man figure i was looking for his name is Jesus Christ :) and to find him was the best thing ever he brought me so much blessings but most of all he brought me peace the peace that i needed :) I also have a blog if you would like to check it out
You can learn more about the changes i went through there :)
God loves you, You are not alone and you dont have to do this alone.
He will provide in whatever you need, all you have to do is trust him :)
Hopefully this helped you.
I will be praying for you :)

Anonymous said...

Wow on that last comment. God is looking for spiritual fruit not religious nuts. Look Hollywood, good things never come easy, and when you really want something it is even harder to obtain. Your young, sexy, smart, and sexy! Let life shape you like a clay figure and when it is time and the hands of time and the motion of life has ceased and the creation of a beautiful work of art is done, some one will love you and take you home and display you for the whole world to see. Just live your life in the now, not the past or the future.