Saturday's with Stef: God, we need to talk ASAP! CALL ME!

12:00 AM

They tell me not to lose faith. It's the 11th hour and God hasn't blessed us with a home. Am I scared? Yes. Frightened? Yes. Terrified? MOS DEF. But what can I do. I never thought we would be in this position, no less have such a huge hurricane. I look at my mom and I want her pain to go away. I want us to be Happy again. I want her to be happy again.

I pray every night we get a call, "The house is yours" I try to be the positivity when there is none, but how much more positive can I be?  

Gods time is perfect, I get that. But I am a tad confused why I feel like we are paying a price when we have been good people. I know some of you are thinking, "God never gives you anything you cant handle." But doesn't he see we are drowning in our 11th hour? 

Maybe I am losing faith. Maybe I want to have a real "Come to Jesus Talk" and tell the big man up stairs that this whole 11th hour, is tearing us apart. But I am smiling. I am praying. I am telling him I trust him. How much more do I need to do? Become a nun?

Then I think, he's trying to tell us something, "Down size little ones" and I don't get why I am the only one in this house who is hearing this message. DOWN SIZE.

Maybe I am losing faith. Maybe I'm confused if he's even listening...

This sucks so bad, I don't wish this upon ANYONE!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hola Stephanie!
I am sorry for your trying moments. It is human nature to feel what you are feeling. Sometimes things happen that we do not understand so we end up fighting against it oblivious that we're just making it worse. The other day I was watching Oprah and she said something that moved me, she said "Life is not happening to us, it's happening for us." Everything happens for a reason and with patience, faith and self-compassion we learn and grow towards God's plan for us.

God said He would never leave us nor forsake us. So in all circumstances, we can give thanks that God has not left us on our own. I feel you my friend, you and your familia will be in my prayers. God Bless. <3

~SimplyyMayra :)