Saturday's With Stef: What If I Grow Old Alone?

5:03 PM

I felt it coming. I felt weird all day. Like he and I were gonna cross paths. The energy between us is like two magnets.

He came back to talk, apologize.

When i say "He" I mean Mr.Cochino

My heart sank to the bottom of my stomach.

I cried myself to sleep.

And I woke up sad.

I miss who I thought he was. I miss the good parts.

I started crying to my mom. I don't get how I can be treated like shit from these men who realize what they have a day late and a dollar short.

Can a man change? Do people change? Is he being sincere? 

When will I find someone who knows what he has when he has me?

I dont know if he and I will ever talk again but it had me thinking of my future. I cried out of fear. Fear of ending up alone. Fear of always being shit on. 
Fear of never really finding true love.

That's a scary thought. 

To end up alone with dogs.

I don't want to grow old alone.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I haven't been on your page in FOREVER, but GIRRRRRL I wanted to tell you that you look AMAZING!! I am so proud of your journey! Keep pushing!