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That's me. Have you ever taken a picture and say, "Is that me?"
I call this, "The Fat Girl Complex"
More than often I walk into the the Plus Size section.
More than often I still think I am overlooked.
More than often the mental image of myself in my head is still 264 pounds.
The feeling doesnt go away.
I was so used to being heavy for SOOO long, that "Small Stefanie" is kinda of hard to adjust too.
YOure probably thinking, "Are you serious?" Im dead serious. I can take all the selfies I want but sometimes the mental image I have of me (keyword is :Sometimes) is of a bigger Stefanie.
And lemme tell you...maintaining is a beast. I am constantly struggling.
When people tell me, "Well the hard part is over!" I look at them insane. It's not. The hardest part is NOT gaining it all back and it's so easy too!
I get in the "Well it wont hurt me" mentality and before you know it, Im feeling sick to my stomach and remembering how easy it is to gain than to lose.
I guess I am just ranting.
Happy Saturday Kiddos!
2 comments:
Reading this post, you sound just like me. I know exactly how you're feeling. Take care and stay positive.
Dear STEF, you have build a strong foundation through this journey of yours. You've managed to accomplished something many women wish to do but aren't mentally strong or motivated enough to seek through till the end. YOU have gone through a lot of battles to be here today. You've worked HARD to mold your body into the physic you worked hard to get. So remember that you are stronger than ever before. You stand tall and proud... Remember how hard it's been to be fit and healthy. Remember that YOU SHOULD BE a HAPPY butterfly that's no longer in her cocoon(figuratively speaking);). Sooo in closing; SMILE!!! cuz damn you look tooo good to be a THUG. sincerely.. a big fan.
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