This week a friend on Facebook asked me if people (men) from my past all of a sudden wanna date me and how do I react.
See last year I made a HUGE mistake of giving these men the time of day only to be let down. I'm just the arm candy they wanted wrapped in their beds and really could care less about me. Hence "Hank Moody", who was often the man I went to time to time because he strung me along. Before the new year began I sent him a text, pretty much that I don't deserve a man like him. Men like him don't go far in life and cant truly make a woman happy because they are unhappy with themselves. He never responded and I was actually happy. I do hope he finds a woman who loves him and he doesn't treat as badly as he treated me.
But it wasn't just him. I gave many men who turned the cheek when I was heavier the time of day because they saw thinner Stef. MY MISTAKE. If you didn't want me THEN, I DON'T WANT YOU NOW, is my NEW motto.
I know I am gorgeous. I know men who would GIVE anything to have me as their girlfriend, to wife me and make a family with me. Sadly, these past men aren't any of them.
New Years Day I woke up to 12 text messages from different men "Happy New Year Stef, maybe we can go out this year!" Um no. All 12 implied going out THIS year. NO THANK YOU! I'm not interested anymore. Texts erased!
I met a man 3000 miles away that truly wants to get to know me. All the fun stuff, what I like, what I don't. I don't know where WE will end up. Maybe he will be my soul mate, maybe he'll simply be just a man who stays in my life. All I know is getting to know things about him makes me feel like I am 15. Even though there is no commitment and he is allowed to date other women until we meet and figure something out, and vice versa, we are focusing on us. And that's the best part....
All I know is men from the past aren't gonna save me.
They would stand and laugh and I am not looking for a man who will do that.
I want a man who will stick out the bad times with me and want to live in a house with a big backyard and have BBQ's on summer Sundays. A man who would never go to bed mad at me. Who would meet death before he lets me meet harm or causes me pain.
I need a man who thinks I am the most amazing thing in the world even when I cop an attitude. A man who gives me himself wholly and isn't afraid to say "I do" in front of my family and his.
So these men in the past....don't get the time of day with me anymore. I know my worth.